27 July 2020

Oh the pull

My friend asks me what do I find frightening about the possibility of being pregnant.

I find it so strange that the others do not have the same concerns I have.

9 months without painkillers. The sole idea makes me breathe harder. I have signed up for 20 sessions of back strengthening with a professional in September, but let's be honest... 9 months?
Don't get me wrong, sometimes I go 5 weeks without painkillers, but there are times when I spend nights walking in circles around the house since I cannot stand, sit or lay down, and those nights I juggle between Ibuprofen, morphine, cortisol and aspirin in doses that are frankly embarassing.

9 months without drugs, 9 months without wine.

9 months of weight going up without any possibility to revert the trend

and the food? my pregnant friends do not eat any raw vegetable, any milk, any egg unless hard-boiled, any rice, any pasta, any raw fish or raw meat. And this list exhaust everything I DO eat (and like).


Well I met a friend who is a psychiatrist during the weekend and she's had two twins 4 months ago. She told me "the worst part was going 9 months without benzodiazepines". A soul like mine, finally...
We spent the weekend smoking weed, but hey, I stayed away from painkillers. I'm not even kidding myself.

4 comments:

Bathwater said...

You have valid fears. I suggest yoga and meditation to help with the pain if you do get pregnant. I don't know what to tell you about the food.

Anonymous said...

well, one thing is, you go on a bit of a natural high. secondly, you go to bed early. you'll be ok about the food. you do it because you care. the pain problem, i can't say much. i think you can have aspirin at certain times in the pregnancy. you should talk to your doctor about it. he might have an idea. hugs from accross the world xoxoxoxoxo personally, I'm exited for you. i guess that doesn't help much :/

Jeune et jolie said...

I'm not a mom, but all of the women in my family have eaten everything they wanted during their pregnancies, and all my cousins and I turned out fine. I don't think you should listen to your friends in terms of food because bodies are different and if they do not want to give their babies certain foods their only depriving the poor creature of so many nutrients!
I do not know your history with painkillers, or if you have an addiction, but you can use foods/natural remedies for that? It seems like they will obviously not be enough but I hope they can at least ease down the pain a bit.

Good luck on your pregnancy if you decide to go through with it.

les jeune fille à les oiseaux said...

Your fears are similar to mine, particularly 9 months without drugs. 9 months without Xanax and I very well may just disappear. Pregnancy is honestly a nightmare of mine.