13 April 2011
Then this thing turned out so evil, I don't know why I'm still surprised
(to my ED) But you'll always be my hero, even though you've lost your mind I keep swinging. I don't even ultra-super-mega binge. Honest. I never get to the point I consider puking. Then I realize I've fagocitated 2500kcals in a single day. ...and it's sick that all these battles, are what keeps me satisfied... I don't know. My mounth is still tore up due to the tooth estraction, therefore puking is not an option. I've never been much of a MIA, but I'm considering this: I need to drop the fat. I must stop the binge. Therefore, (as soon as my mouth heals), I may consider throwing up after bingeing, as a punishment (I don't believe in throwing up for losing weight: it takes 20minutes to absorb the calories; my massive overeating happens at the parents' place, where coffee goes on for a while after eating, so puking would happen too late to help). Effing disgusting, I know. I must stop running away, and start facing reality. Each calory counts. At least I'm still training hard.. On to another subject. Bloggers sometimes disappear. Sometimes someone we specially care for disappears, and when it's within the blogorexia, it's often scary. Did they drop out because they're happy? I hope so, but often don't believe it. Marcus from Do you like lemones? disappeared, and even cancelled his blog. Marcus, I hope you're doing great, but I miss you. Miss Burton, on the other hand, may be back. I really hope she decides to come back to the blogorexia, because I missed her too! Belle, who later turned into Rogue, is another beautiful person I lost track of. And I think everybody remembers (wonders?) about Ana Regziz. Love you all sweeties. I'm not commenting much, but I'm still reading!
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4 comments:
Those binges are difficult to deal with, but perhaps you should consider some other way of punishment than throwing up. It's just so destructive to your body...
i miss marcus too. I really was fond of him. I hope he's alright, but i'm like you, it worries me a lot when they disappear.
oh darling. thaaaank you!
ok so it's missburtonbitesback.blogspot.com now. :)
gosh, i've missed you guys. I know it's super silly when people disappear. I was shocked to find out Marcus had gone, too. I never talked much to him cuz i had do leaver bloggers soon after meeting him but felt connected to him, after all he was from where i live.
Yes, it is scary. Sometimes I wonder who had to go, who made the decision on his own or if someone had to delete to blog because they haven't made it. Weird.
How cuuuuuuuuuute, my blogarexia expression is still being used here? haha. wow.
so how are you now? who's that boyfriend you're talking about, is he really from LDN? (happy girl! making me jealous.)
tell me everything, how'd you meet him?
:D still those tours with your family.
so 130 lbs now, huh?
hm.
let's get rid of it.
ah glad to be back. Glad to see that you're still here
x
woooops ...
darling dont get me wrong but you know what i just realised?
i forgot so many details about your life. :( it's been way too long.
so where are you now? and what job are you leaving for?
but florence sounds nice. to me it's got that NY, Paris, London, Milano sound. As in summer, but not too hot. summer dress, a breeze and shades.
well, the perfect set for a photo shoot with a gorgeous skinny girl.
So he'll stay there til late 2011? Boy, that sucks. For you, I mean. Bet he's quite glad (not cuz of you, but someone who has the opportunity to live in LDN simply has to be happ :D)
So how much do you spend on travelling back and forth? ...
Sounds like a good relationship though, not everyone manages to keep his girl/her boy for more than a couple weeks when they have to move.
competition?
hm. yap. i think it's about time.
so how exactly do you want to do this?
xxx
I worry about the people who drop off the map too. I secretly fear that they've died. I honestly feel angry at people who decided they wanted to fight to get better and had to leave, but didn't do the courtesy of saying they've chosen life and health. Come on, people! BALLS, GROW SOME!! /range, lol!!
Thank you for the comment *Hugs* Yeah, I hope its something that can be easily fixed. Gods, being this fucked up forever would be totally gutting!
Have a good weekend, ok?
xoxoxoxo
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