28 June 2020

and what if I did it again?

I do not expect anyone to be reading this from back in 2010. But back then I did drop a lot of weight, managed to reach a healthy BMI for once, with 115 pounds and BMI of 18.2.
I had abs showing
I started dating husband.

On this Sunday morning, while working (of course), writing slides on powerpoint and managing some admin stuff, I suddenly thought: and what if I really did it again? Instead of just blogging, obsessing and complaining. What I mean is, what would change if I did it again?

Beside the obvious joy I mean.
Work-wise, for example, it would not make things easier, quite the contrary. Sad but true, being the "once she was a real hottie" is much easier.


I can't control this flesh and blood
That's wrapped around my bones
It moves beneath me like a river
Into the great unknown


Nel deserto la nave abbandonai
Per me aveva senso
Son stato troppo tempo nella bestia
Ed ora saro libero

Someday we'll live like horses
Free rein from your old iron fences
There's more ways than one to regain your senses
Break out the stalls and we'll live like horses someday
Elton John and Luciano Pavarotti, Live like horses

I abandoned my ship in the desert
It made sense
Too much time being a beast
And now I will be free

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

i got back to (almost) the "magic number" where i used to be twice in the past. very similar to you, aroumd the time i was dating my now husband and another time when things were not great. surprisingly those times i was good in terms of weight, my mental health was not good. weird but true xoxo

Bathwater said...

Lucy you need to do it for yourself. Be healthy for you and forget those people at work. In fact forget about work. It is just a job. It is not who you are.