19 March 2015

ugh

Sometimes I think I could stop this struggle and just accept the reality, meaning the current weight, accepting I'll never be skinny again
and then in dawns of me I gave up the hope of getting skinny, I'd be giving up the hope for happiness.

And this is so sad, it brings tears to my eyes.

I need to spend more time with my husband

Right now my life seems to consist purely of work, work frustration, restricting, training, bingeing, work...

And now my friends, after 12 solid hours of work, I'll go home to train with Jillian Michaels (my hero)

12 March 2015

everything's awesome

76 days to summer vacation

Liberally quoting from an Italian song

Even though everything is awesome
I'll try not to feel like it's scolding me
It may be my dreams are all wrong
are delusions
Right now they belong to me

Outside everything's aweome