Family drama - Fitness thinspo

Previously on Waiting for the miracle to come:

Grandfather: about 10 days ago, he went nuts and hit multiple times my grandmother with his crutches. Both of them are 88, both have serious health issues, and lived at home. After the hitting and another violent outbreak, and he begged us to take him away from home, we found him a place in a nursing home, which is honestly not bad, in a nice place with a great view (and that charges us 2.500 Euros a week - over 3 thousand USD).

From then, it's been downhill, and not in a good way: after a couple of days he started forgetting things, then stopped eating and so on.

In this episode

After working on Saturday (fuck), yesterday I went with the Sponsor (aka Dad) to see Grandfather. In addition to not eating, he's completely lost his mind (in less than 10 days). He has no clue about where he is, is desperate to go home.

Grandmother, however, is having serious problems and may need to replace her knee prosthesis, which at 88 is no small deal.

Dad is not doing good either, working too much and with too many things on his shoulders, the last thing he needed right now was facing his own crying father, who was begging to be taken home.

And in this mess, nobody even guessed that he could stay with my parents: when they got married, he cut them financially, and never ever helped them out, so the Panther (aka Mom) pretty much hates him, and can't really be blamed for that, so there's no way in hell she would agree to look after him. Dad, on the other side, works well over 70 hours every week, so he's no option either.

All in all, this was deeply depressing. I'll try to use these nursing home souvenirs as a motivator for hitting the gym more often.

In the meanwhile, have some fitness thinspo and motivators!

winner of NYC Marathon 2011 (woman)

Autumn thinspo

I couldn't make it for Halloween... Sorry guys. Some huge family issues came up.

Anyway, here's my Autums thinspo, hope you like it!

Allow me to begin with... Autumn Reeser!

Fallen leaves make the season, don't they?

Alessandra Ambrosio is always my fave

Pumpkin anyone???

Sally and Jack are so skinny..

I survived Easter gaining 1kg.

I guess it could have been worse, but this leaves me with 32 days before bikini time in Greece.

My new favourite thinspo is:

So yeah. Embarassing AND pathetic.

So it's really time to gather our strenghts, ladies. Summertime is coming, and there will be no forgiveness.

Ask me to wear white for you, and I'll be yours forever

This body? I'd kill to have it!

Instead of asking me, he's leaving in 5 days. And I'm hopelessly in love.

A few nights ago he said "When in ten months we'll still be in love as we are now, we shall get married".

My hair looks just like that. How come my body DOESN'T?

Show me love (+ t.A.T.u. thinspo)

This was an accident, not the kind where sirens sound

Never even noticed we’re suddenly crumbling

Tell me how you’ve never felt delicate or innocent,

Do you still have doubts that us having faith makes any sense?

Steve was testing me and even if I realized it, I was too bitter and just told him the truth. He asked me about the weekend and insisted, until I unveiled how “Boyfriend and I” was more like “Boyfriend, his two lady-friends from work, and I” and how I felt I was the one intruding. How they treat him like he’s THEIR boyfriend, chaperoning them here and there, how when I was soo tired at 6AM in the morning and felt like fainting we had to stay at the party (which was over) because one of them was hanging out with a boy and we couldn’t just leave her like that. (Hello? The girl is aged 34 and was driving her own car, and was not drunk. Couldn’t she deal with her own shit, huh?). I’m not even jealous, I know it’s like that when I’m not there, it’s fine, I don’t care, but when I’m in the scene, well, I AM THE GIRLFRIEND!!!!!

Steve said I’m crazy if I’m accepting this situation, and I said I don’t know what to do. I said I cannot possibly dump him now: he quit his job and is moving to Italy for me, and I know what it’s like, so I just can’t dump him.

Steve said I should know all issues will eventually emerge. Which deep in my heart I know is likely. He didn't take the news very well though. I hurt him and I didn't want to. He just didn't let go and kept asking until I spilled everything.

I play games you play tricks,

Girls and girls but I’m the one

Like a game of pick up sticks,

Played by fucking lunatics!

So now let’s summarize what’s on my mind:

No 1: I’m fucking scared about BF moving, and I can’t avoid it. I know that if he wasn’t moving, I’d consider breaking up. In the end, I know all I can do is wait for him to settle here and see how things will go.

No 2: Steve may or may not be sentimentally involved with me. He may or may not have been hoping that I’d break up with Boyfriend. I’m fucking scared I’m going to lose him. Two hours ago he had to leave for a new project and will be working out of the office until September (although in the city): I’m already a bit at loss.

No 3: 124.1lbs. Again. I hate myself, I wanna cry and cry and cry. Instead, I have to work. Well, with Steve out of the office, no one will notice I’m fasting.

As for the new girl, here is my decision. Today I’m working in a part of the office where I won’t see her, but when I go back to the open space, I’ll just hide my red bracelet. I’ll even take it off for a couple of days if necessary. In the meanwhile, I’ll watch over her. Let’s see whether she starts crying or not. I really hope for both of us that she doesn’t.

PS: Matilda, lovely, the red bracelet is the worldwide symbol of ana supporters.