When I was a kid, I desperately wanted to be a boy (only one person in the world wanted that more than I did - my mother). Since that was not going to happen, I desperately wanted to be tall and boyish. At 14 I got a boy haircut (which did NOT suit me). I was severely underweight, but I wanted to be tall to be able to ride my brother's enduro motorbike.
I ended up being a tall woman (at least for Italian standards). Years went by and I also ended up being a fat woman.
And funnily, I now wish I was shorter, smaller, petite. I am so jealous of my short friends who, even when they get fat (they usually don't), have such little weight to carry around.
I still wish I was born as a boy.
3 comments:
I think you make an impressive woman.
Thanks guys for your lovely comments. To be fair, my mom wished I was a boy for me - she believed and believes that life is easier for a boy.
And she had it easier with my elder brother than with me of course.
And clearly now that we're all adults, my brother doesn't do much for her, but.. it is what it is.
I'm also quite sure that I'm a bit blind about difficulties that men have to face, and that often I think everything is easier for men and probably I'm wrong about it.
It's just that sometimes... the barriers feel different.
The barriers are different. The world's expectations are different. The expectations we set for ourselves can be the hardest, even though those are the ones we have the most control over.
Parents usually want the best for us, but they are not us and come from different times and perspectives. Ava's parents are much like yours, and she feels the same pressure. But you are not living to make them happy; you are living for yourself.
I hope you had a good time last night.
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